- - Tortola & Virgin Gorda (BVI) - -

Now,  for you sailors and racing nuts, I offer up some new Christmas Carols for you to learn:

Hard a- lee hard a-lee ,
Tacking all the way .
Oh what fun it is to ride -
a  High  Performance  sleigh - eh

 

Spectra here , Carbon there,
what fun to spend the buck.
Dollars make us win today.
Hey ! Nothings left to luck

 

OOOOOOOh !

Hard a-lee, hard a-lee
winning is the way,
Dig really deep my sailor friend,
If you want to play-ehhhh

 

Melges here , J boat there
See how fast they go,
If you want to get a first
spend money , don't cha know.

 

O, wooden boat! my wooden boat!
It is my hope you stay afloat ,
O, worms and rot, I want you not,
There's bottom paint on , coat by coat.

 

I varnished here
I varnished there
I used brushes of -  the finest hair.

 

O,  Wooden boat!  My wooden boat!
All this up-keep makes me broke.

 

Oh little boat of  fiber-glass,
How still I see thee lie.
With blisters on your bottomside,
the size of an apple pie.

 

But in the dark wet brewing,
delamination grows .
Neglected years, the owner's tears,
West System Epoxy knows!

On the first day of racing , my  new crew brought to me
A big fat D-eeee N F.

 

On the second day  of racing , my new crew brought to me
Two tangled sheets and a big fat D-eee N F

On the third day of racing , my new crew brought to me
Three bad tacks , two tangled sheets and a big fat D-eee N F.

 

On the fourth day of racing my ,   new crew brought to me ...
four spinnaker wraps , three bad tacks , two tangled sheets and a big fat D-eee N F

 

On the fifth day of racing , my new crew brought to me ,...
Five accidental  jibes .... four spinnaker wraps , three bad tacks, two tangled sheets and a big Fat D-eee N F..

 

On the sixth day of racing , my new crew brought to me.
Six winches back wound, Five accidental  jibes ,four spinnaker wraps , three bad tacks, two tangled sheets and a big Fat D-eee N F

 

On the seventh day of racing,  my new crew brought to me..
Seven sea-sick throw ups, Six winches back wound, Five accidental  jibes ,four spinnaker wraps , three bad tacks, two tangled sheets and a big Fat D-eee N F..

 

On the eighth day of racing, my new crew brought to me..
Eight beers a -drinking, Seven sea-sick throw ups, Six winches back wound Five accidental  jibes ,four spinnaker wraps , three bad tacks, two tangled sheets and a big Fat D-eee N F..

 

On the Ninth day of racing , my new crew brought to me ..
Nine winch handles swimming, Eight beers a -drinking, Seven sea-sick throw ups, Six winches back wound, Five accidental  jibes ,four spinnaker wraps , three bad tacks, two tangled sheets and a big Fat D-eee N F.

 

On the tenth day of racing , my new crew brought to me ....
Ten  halyards let loose, Nine winch handles swimming, Eight beers a -drinking, Seven sea-sick throw ups, Six winches back wound, Five accidental  jibes ,four spinnaker wraps , three bad tacks, two tangled sheets and a big Fat D-eee N F.

 

On the Eleventh day of racing , my new crew brought to me ..
Eleven  Chute poles broken,  Ten  halyards let loose, Nine winch handles swimming, Eight beers a -drinking, Seven sea-sick throw ups, Six winches back wound, Five accidental  jibes ,four spinnaker wraps , three bad tacks, two tangled sheets and a big Fat D-eee N F.

 

On the Twelth day of racing , my new crew brought to me ....
Twelve headsails overboard, Eleven  Chute poles broken,  Ten  halyards let loose, Nine winch handles swimming, Eight beers a -drinking, Seven sea-sick throw ups, Six winches back wound, Five accidental  jibes, four spinnaker wraps , three bad tacks, two tangled sheets and a big Fat D-eee N S.

 

A DNS is a racing term for Did Not Start and a DNF is a Did Not Finish.

 

Sheets are those bits of ropes used to tame the sails after they are up and during racing, need frequent adjusting to keep the helmsmen from screaming too much.

 

A tack is when the boat is forced to do a zigzag course upwind, when you tack, that is when your change direction in your zigzag course so  you have to let go of the sheets on one side of the boat and reel them on the other side with the use of a winch and winch handle (unless you are super strong.)

 

A spinnaker is a big balloon-ish type sail flown off the bow (pointy end) of the boat and used to go downwind, but when you wrap it around the forestay, (that long piece of wire helping to hold up the mast) you typically go nowhere and the captain teaches you a whole new language that would make your mother ashamed to know you.

 

An accidental jibe is when you are typically going downwind and you get off course and the mainsail slams across the boat, bringing the boom with it (that horizontal stick attached to the mast) often breaking bits of the boat when it jibes, this also often causes the captain to have conniptions. The boom is named so, cause that's the last thing you hear before it knocks you unconscious.  (See VISAR term below).

 

Winches backwound:  winches only work one way and typically that is clock-wise. You wrap the sheet around, then use a winch handle to crank in the sheets, thus trimming the sail and hopefully gaining speed, depending on the point of wind. But some folks manage to wrap the sheets around counter-clockwise, which in effect, makes the power of the winch, useless. This will slow down the boat considerably if you are trying to tack and or  trim sails to go faster and generally, the captain is clasping his heart and his face is beat red when you do this. He may even be rendered temporarily speechless.

 

A halyard is that piece of rope used to raise the sails up the mast (that upright tall stick commonly found on all sailboats, some even have two or more masts).  When you let the halyard go by not cleating it off when done, it dangles from the top of the mast and swings around wildly and always out of reach of the crew trying to grasp it. If the sail is up, it generally slams back down, and the sudden force, often pulls  the bitter end  up to  the top of the mast. This means a crew must be dispatched to climb the mast (a very difficult feat generally reserved for coconut tree climbers, or the mentally insane) and fetch the loose halyard.  If you have  a spare halyard for another sail, you can tie a person (generally someone scared of heights) to it and crank them up the mast and listen to them scream and curse you out, while they retrieve the errant halyard. The bitter end, well that's the end of the rope or halyard or sheet.  named so for obvious reasons.

 

 A chute pole is rigged opposite the side of the spinnaker and aids in keeping its semi-balloon shape. A broken chute pole, is therefore useless.

 

Headsails are the sails, be it a jib or spinnaker etc.,rigged at the front (pointy end of the boat.)  When one goes overboard, it generally acts like a brake and stops all motion, it then typically wraps itself around the keel and then jams the rudder (the thing that steers the boat) and finally stabilizes the engine propeller (never good!) At this point the captain my be swiftly contemplating committing suicide or murder, depending on his/her mood at the moment. 

 

VISAR (Virgin Islands Search and Rescue) is who you generally call when life and limb are in severe danger (as in captain is now rapidly making a noose and angrily looking your way...)

 

Cruzins in Carrot Bay (http://Cruzins.com)

OPEN Christmas eve, Christmas day and Boxing Day 
Special menu including Turkey with all the fixins
CLOSED New Years Eve and New Years Day
 
Soon Come Dec/January Cruzin' surf shop & boutique. 
Your Carrot Bay connection for Surf Gear, Local art & Crafts, Debi Carson Art & Jewelry, Trish Flemming art & jewelry,  Local Carrot bay arts & Crafts, Joseph Hodge artwork, David Thrasher artwork, Aragorn arts & crafts.  Sunny Caribe and more to soon come.
 
So now there's even more reasons to cruise on in to Cruzin' Bar & Grille on the North Shore in the heart of Carrot bay !
Stop by any time for a cool drink, a fresh hot pizza or any of our great daily specials !