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- - - 2001 Hurricane Season - - -

- The Storm with No Name
  • From: Crane Peter <pcrane AT mail.caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Mon, 17 Dec 2001 07:43:15 -0400
Hello again.
This is your damp Nevis correspondent.

We got ANOTHER couple of inches on Saturday and an inch on Sunday.  
It probably serves me right for answering that SPAM that advertises 
      "Add 1 to 3 inches - guaranteed"!
(If you don't get that advert you won't know what I'm talking about)

Hey - I was right about the storm splitting, wasn't I?
Amazing or what?
There are now patches of blue sky.

Oh, I must thank Bill T. and Anne B. and Suz SM. for their kind messages.

There's a LOT of work to do in the yard when it is dry enough 
to stick my nose out, and I dread to think how long it will take 
to cut the grass.

Regards,
Prof. Peter 'Three Inches' Crane
P.S.
The ISP wouldn't let me log on all day yesterday!


- Supercell?
  • From: Crane Peter <pcrane AT mail.caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Sat, 15 Dec 2001 15:38:47 -0400
They talk about this storm being a supercell.
OK, what's a supercell then?

All I know is that we got another two inches and it was so cold 
(yes, I mean it, really) that I didn't go out at all today!  
My darling wife hung the clothes on the gallery but I didn't 
help her - too busy fixing a light fitting (excuses, excuses).

Well, looking at the satellite pictures, it appears that the band 
of rain and cloud and wind that is stretching all the way from the 
Caribbean to the coast of Africa is splitting into two parts.  
The larger part is streaming eastwards (very fast) towards Africa 
and the smaller part (over my head) is almost stationary but I 
wouldn't be too surprised if it moved NNW and intensified a bit.
So, if it happens like that you heard it here first and if it doesn't
then at least I am being consistent in my rubbish prognostications.

Honey, where did you put my woolly jumper?

Regards,
Prof. Peter 'Frigid' Crane


- The Good, the Bad, and the Tragic
  • From: Crane Peter <pcrane AT mail.caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Fri, 14 Dec 2001 17:56:43 -0400
I know that no-one is reading this, what with the season being 
over 'n all, but what the heck?

Damage Report:-
Where I live we only got 2 inches of rain, but it is still raining.
At 12 noon parts of the island were still without electricity after
   18 hours of blackout!
As I said, yesterday, we have lost some shingles.
We have also lost gutters (spouting).
Our banana & plantain stands have been blown down.  This means 
    that it must have been blowing at more than 45 mph, 'cos 
    that is when bananas fall over.
Lots of other trees (papaya, citrus, etc.) uprooted or blown over.

Looking at the satellite picture the storm (we are on the edge of it) 
is almost stationary and intensifying.  
What will it do?
Will it dissipate or intensify further?
Will it go East or West or straight up?

Regards,
Prof. Peter 'Puddleduck' Crane


- Oh What a Night!
  • From: Crane Peter <pcrane AT mail.caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Fri, 14 Dec 2001 00:42:36 -0400
You thought I'd gone?  Hah!

At about 6pm, yesterday evening, a storm blew up out of NOWHERE!
No warning, not nuffink!

The North side of Nevis was blasted.  
Trees uprooted, power poles down, no lectrickery.
We had power for quite a long time, but the whole of the island
is now in darkness.
The radio is off the air so I can't give you a definitive description 
of the situation (do I ever?) but I hear that the Four Seasons Hotel 
has suffered somewhat, but is coping.
We've lost shingles, I know, but I'm not going out to check on
the state of the yard - that'll wait until the morning.
Our two dogs are cuddling on the porch, poor things.

So there!  Looks like the 2002 hurricane season has started early.

Regards,
Prof. Peter 'Buggrit' Crane


- Last entry?
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Thu, 22 Nov 2001 11:49:35 -0400
It is HOT and DRY here in Nevis.
This is supposed to be the wet season but WE are not getting enough.
(Story of my life, huh?)

I got a surprise e-mail from an old French buddy who has been reading
the entries in STORMCARIB and found my e-mail address.  
Bonjour, Guy.

Isn't it nice to know how many folk are interested in this web-site?

Assuming that there are no more storms this year (that's done it!)
you might be pleased to hear that this will be my last entry for 2001.

Regards,
Prof. Peter 'Au Revoir' Crane


- Technicalities
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Fri, 09 Nov 2001 17:46:24 -0400
A muggy day in down-town Nevis!
Positive ions peaked at 37.2 blurqs per cubic zlort!
Huh?
Don't ask ME!
All I can say (without fear of contraception - sorry CONTRADICTION) 
is that it felt sweaty and miserable.  
         But I am not complaining.
And the mosquitoes!  Fierce or what?
         But I am not complaining.
And the grass is growing SO high.
         But I am not complaining.
OK, you get the idea.

Regards,
Prof. Peter 'Unhappy Bunny' Crane
P.S.
Tomorrow will be gorgeous!
You heard it here first.


- On Track
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Wed, 07 Nov 2001 17:33:11 -0400
After quite a few days of unbroken blue skies we AT LAST got a shower!
Not a lot.
But we got a quarter-of-an-inch and that can't be bad.
I'm not complaining.
   (those who know me will tell you that I NEVER complain).
   (I might comment negatively - but COMPLAIN?).

Talking about complaining, my wife says I have a one-track mind!
Can you believe that?  ME!  no, no, NO!

I think about LOTS of other things, sometimes, occasionally (maybe)!

Regards,
Prof. Peter 'Love-on-my-mind' Crane


- The Love of Distant Wales
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Mon, 29 Oct 2001 15:21:06 -0400
Oh, if only the weather could ALWAYS be like this!
It is GLORIOUS.
Not too hot (most of the time), a pleasant breeze and a couple of quick 
but heavy showers every day ...

You should see the limes on our trees.  The branches are bending under 
their weight.  And the peanuts are bursting through.  Wonderful!

Anyway, you know John (my e-mail chess buddy/adversary/enemy/nemesis)?
No?  
Well, never-mind, he is the proud creator of the offical web-site of 
Caerwys Town and he welcomes one-and-all to visit him there.
You will find it as 
                      www.caerwys.com

Don't tell him that I sent you, though!

Regards,
Prof. Peter 'Come-buy-de-limes' Crane


- Cats & Dogs
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Wed, 17 Oct 2001 15:32:48 -0300
At about 11am my better half said that she thought it might rain and
asked me to help her get the laundry in from the line.
Naturally, I said "Yes, Sweetheart, it will be a pleasure" while I 
was THINKING "Oh no!  Do I have to?".
But OF COURSE I had to!  
    (what do YOU think, girls?)
    (what do YOU think, boys?)

Drops were starting to fall as we came in and then DOWN IT CAME!
And it fell in solid lumps for 4 hours (ONE inch!).
The sun is out again, now - hot!

Regards,
Prof. Peter 'Domestic Bliss' Crane


- The Green Hills of Nevis
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Mon, 15 Oct 2001 08:50:51 -0300
OK, people in Cyberland, I managed to check the PIG.
FIVE inches of rain in 36 hours!
Wow!
Everything is so GREEN!

All schools have been suspended for the day due to 'inclement 
weather conditions'.

It is still overcast with occasional showers but there is a slight 
hint that the sun might peep out.

Regards,
Prof. Peter 'Interesting' Crane


- Distant Thrums
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Sun, 14 Oct 2001 15:30:17 -0300
This ain't very funny
And it sure ain't not sunny
But we're getting more water
Than ever we oughter
And it's cold and it's wet and it's runny.

It is STILL raining.
Not a lot of Flash/Bang/Wallop at the moment, but you can hear it
in the distance.

Regards,
Prof Peter 'Nobel Prize for Literature' Crane


- Madness
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Sun, 14 Oct 2001 10:28:37 -0300
I must have been almost insane
When I told you I wanted more rain.
And what did I get?
I got soaking wet!
Now rain is the bane of Crane!!

The thunderstorm started yesterday afternoon and it has been torrential 
rain and ziggy-zaggies ever since.
All night long it poured and flashed and banged and the electricity
stayed on!  Amazing!  
It's gone now, though.  The electricity - not the storm.

So, how much rain fell?
Difficult to say because it is STILL raining so I'm not going to check 
the PIG - but I guess it will be around the three inches mark.
I might update you later.

There was no hint from the satellite pictures that a storm was approaching.
Maybe I'm losing my touch.

Regards,
Prof. Peter 'Dribble-Dribble' Crane



- Most Peculiar
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Mon, 08 Oct 2001 11:10:39 -0300
This morning as I was quietly sitting on the gallery, nibbling a few
mushrooms, a most strange ship sailed by.
How to describe it?
Well, although I cannot be EXACT, you understand, it had a length of
approximately three hundred cubits and was about fifty cubits wide!
The captain hailed me as it passed but I couldn't quite catch his words.
But his wife looked a bit of all right!

Er, what do you mean "Was it raining?"?
Yeah, of course it was and it is and it might rain for a bit longer.

Regards,
Prof. Peter 'Two-by-Two' Crane


- Cold Comforts
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Fri, 05 Oct 2001 10:05:52 -0300
Last night - half an inch of rain and the electricity was on-and-off 
all night!
Thank you for the rain.

But we went out for a meal at the Four Seasons Resort!
Delightful!
If any of you, out there in cyberland, are coming to Nevis you
should save some dollars and experience the Four Seasons.  
It might not be cheap (let's be honest, it's expensive) but you'll
have a memorable night.
The setting, the food and the service are on such a high level.

Regards,
Prof. Peter 'Yum-Yum' Crane


- Phew - What a Scorcher
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Sun, 30 Sep 2001 15:16:06 -0300
Oh me oh my,
It is so dry.
I'll say again
We need some rain.

If Suzannah has scattered that white magic powder (see my offering of
September 1) to keep away the storms she might have scattered a wee 
bit too much.

We have had no electricity since 6am.  
The Elec. Co. is doing some scheduled maintenance.  
Let's hope that we get it back soon.

Regards,
Prof. Peter 'Parched' Crane


- Mild Trepidation
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Fri, 14 Sep 2001 16:05:38 -0300
Dearest Chums,
Blue skies, hot sun, gentle breeze.
Situation normal in Nevis.

I must share with you a letter that I recently received.
It said:-

*****************************************************************************
My wife, young daughter and I have a very dear friend in Nevis who 
we would very much like to visit in early October.  Regrettably, my 
good wife is afflicted by an unreasoning fear of hurricanes, and is 
troubled by concerns for the safety of our daughter.  She wonders 
if it wouldn't be safer to visit California and camp somewhere along 
the San Andreas fault instead.

I wondered if you, in your capacity as the undisputed expert on such 
things, could send us a little information on the likelihood of death 
and devastation in Nevis (hurricane-caused) in the first half of October.  
Your thoughts would be greatly appreciated.
*****************************************************************************

Now THAT is much funnier than anything that I have penned!
    ====

Regards,
Prof. Peter 'Expert' Crane


- Sympathy and Outrage
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Wed, 12 Sep 2001 08:27:58 -0300
Gert, I know that this is a vehicle for weather discussion but ...

On this small and beautiful island of Nevis it sometimes seems as though 
the most heinous crime is the theft of someone's pumpkin and excitement, 
for us, is when a hen lays two eggs!

But I must express my most sincere and deep-felt sympathy for:-
        The direct victims in the air and on the ground,
        The families of these direct victims whose lives will be, 
                forever, devastated,
        The peoples of the USA who mourn,
        The many families who will be affected by the economic aftershocks,
        The right-minded peoples throughout the world who share in 
                the shock and horror of this unprecedented attack.

I find it difficult to avoid feelings of vengeance against the perpetrators 
of this atrocity and the leaders who directed, controlled and ordered it.

I also find it difficult to forgive the peoples of the world who rejoice 
in its enormity.

Regards,
Peter Crane


- Never Fear
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Mon, 10 Sep 2001 20:39:36 -0300
Hello Campers.

TD#7 should not be a threat to Nevis (fingers crossed).

Erin looks exciting though, doesn't it?
Good job that it is 'up there'.  There's a bit of a risk that an
off-shoot, from Erin, will fuel TD#7.
Hey, it almost sounds as though I know what I'm talking about.

Still lots of fun in the Atlantic, maybe coming our way.
But you know that I have never been one to cry 'wolf'.

Regards,
Prof. Peter 'Wolf' Crane
P.S.
John and I have started a new e-mail chess game.


- This is your Captain, Speaking
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Thu, 06 Sep 2001 18:05:56 -0300
Fasten Your Seat Belts.
Stow your tables.
Put your seats in the upright position.
We might experience some turbulence!

Eyes right and watch 'em come!
Is this fun or what?
No.
You are right.
It isn't fun - but it IS exciting.

Regards,
Prof Peter 'Head-in-Clouds' Crane
P.S.
Tomorrow is election day on Nevis.
PPS.
That excellent e-mail chess game that I told you about is finished.  
I'm not sure when we'll play again.


- NO MORE HURRICANES, EVER!!
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Sat, 01 Sep 2001 08:00:54 -0300
I am indebted to Suzannah Smith Miles, from Charleston, SC, who is a 
columnist, historian, and author (authoress?) and has recently published 
a fascinating piece in the Moultrie News.
She gives some historical items concerning the ancients' fear of the 
'God Hurricane'.
Did you know that the Mayans of Mexico used human sacrifices to prevent
hurricanes ?!!?
Gert, don't go down Mexico way.

She says:-
    "I, for one, predict that we will get some sort of a blow this year.  
     This is based on scientific factors of great import, the main one 
     being that I finally repaired and painted my picket fence."

Suzannah has a SURE-FIRE method for predicting an oncoming storm.
Oh yes!
She says that ants move inside her house before a storm!
Well, Suzannah, why don't you scatter some Carbaryl powder?  
It will get rid of the ants AND prevent hurricanes!!!!  
MILLIONS will bless you!

So, gentle readers, if that is an end to storms you know who to thank.

Regards,
Prof. Peter 'Fingers Crossed' Crane



- Bang, Bang - Ziggy, Ziggy - Bang, Bang
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Fri, 31 Aug 2001 17:14:32 -0300
Does anyone remember the film 'Chitty Chitty Bang Bang'?
No?
It starred Dick van Dyke.
No?  Never mind.

After a week of beautiful weather we had a STRANGE afternoon today.
Thunderstorms and deluges, and SUNSHINE.  At the same time!
Yes, and triple-banked rainbows - BEAUTIFUL!

I'm looking to the East.
At 7am the threatening Wave was at about 25 West, moving about 20 mph.
At that rate it could arrive in about 5 days.  However there are signs,
AGAINST the predictions, that it is dissipating.  
Still early days though.
FEAR NOT!

Stay Cool,
Prof. Peter 'Steaming' Crane


- Tropical Wave - update
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Wed, 22 Aug 2001 12:52:53 -0300
As I pen these words the sky is still grey but the rain has stopped
(for now) so I popped out to check the PIG.

One-and-a-half inches fell - almost THREE times as much fell as
it did when Tropical Storm CHANTAL passed.

But who's complaining?

Regards,
Prof. Peter 'Complaining' Crane


- Tropical Wave
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Wed, 22 Aug 2001 07:31:20 -0300
Ziggy-zaggy Sizzle.
Crash-Bang-Whallop.
Wind-wind-wind.
Rain-rain-rain.

Regards,
Prof. Peter 'Sensible' Crane
P.S.
When the rain stops I'll check the PIG and tell you how much 
rain we got.


- We have the POWER!
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Fri, 17 Aug 2001 18:48:25 -0300
I do not subscribe to the oft-repeated view that, on Nevis, we get a 
power cut if a dog barks.
Oh no!
I clearly remember a week ago when BOTH our dogs barked and we had
electricity all that night.

But Tropical Storm Chantal passed close to us last night and we had 
power ALL THROUGH.
Well done, NEVLEC (Nevis Electricity).
Credit where credit is due, I always say.

Regards,
Prof. Peter 'Throw Away Those Candles' Crane


- Bye-Bye Chantal
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Fri, 17 Aug 2001 08:11:47 -0300
As I speak the storm seems to be passing.
Still gusty, yes.
We got a good half-inch of rain last night, no problems.

The skies are now mainly lead-grey with small patches of blue.

Best to remember to ignore any of my predictions, OK?

Regards,
Prof. Peter 'Still Here' Crane
P.S.
Looks like I'm going to lose the latest e-mail game of chess with John.
Good game though.


- A Bad Case of Wind
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Thu, 16 Aug 2001 22:44:50 -0300
Poor Chantal!
Wind, wind, wind, but no water.

A drop of rain would be nice, but I'm not too keen on the ziggy-zaggy 
things.

Seems as though it's easing off, now, as I type this.
What's the betting that as soon as I send it we'll be deluged?

Keep smiling,
Prof. Peter 'Oops, Pardon' Crane


- We're OK, but ARE we?
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Thu, 16 Aug 2001 17:48:54 -0300
Dearest Beloveds,
I haven't heard a single Chantal advisory on the local radio (but I 
didn't listen ALL day) , so I guess that it won't be coming here.
Oh, dear, who am I trying to kid?

NOBODY that I spoke to had even heard that there is a TS out there!

So, is it going to pass some 80 miles south of us (I think so).
So, will Nevis be in its 'grunt' (I think so).

But I am cognizant of the fact that it is only a weak TS so I have 
only made rudimentary preparations for this one.

Good luck to all those in its path.

Regards,
Prof. Peter 'Always-look-on-the-brighter-side-of-life' Crane



- Crash Bang Wallop
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Sun, 29 Jul 2001 15:10:47 -0300
A couple of hours after I posted my last feeble offering the heavens OPENED!

The Thunder flashed and the Lightning crashed (or is it the other way
around - I am getting sooo confused nowadays) and it RAINED!
And it kept on raining.
And it kept on flashing (or crashing)
And it kept on crashing (or flashing)

It was still raining and crashing and flashing at 3pm (and is still doing 
so) and when I checked my PIG there were TWO INCHES in it!
And it is STILL falling.
I've seen less rain in Tropical Depressions.
I've even seen less rain in HURRICANES (remember Jose?)!

So, I have got my wish.

You can stop now.  Please?

Regards,
Prof. Peter 'Web-Foot' Crane
P.S.
Our poor two dogs are terrified.


- Cool Running Water
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Sat, 28 Jul 2001 18:53:39 -0300
I WISH!
  ====

We are BACK in drought!!
Not Nevis as a whole.  We see LOTS of rain passing the mountain and 
'blessing' Hamilton, Government Road and Charlestown.  
But WE aren't getting any!
Lots of strong wind (excuse me) and plenty of cloud passes us by, 
but none of the wet stuff.
The grass is turning brown again and we are going round with the hoses.
AGAIN!

Culturama (Nevis' Festival) started last night.  Frolic and Fun for 2001!

Regards,
Prof. Peter 'Deep Thirst' Crane


- Swirly Thing Alert
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Wed, 25 Jul 2001 18:41:16 -0300
Call me alarmist if you like (though I wish that you wouldn't) but
I can see something at about 10N 25W!

Would you like me to predict if it will develop and where it will go?
Well, I'm not gonna!

Regards,
Prof. Peter 'Pig-headed' Crane
P.S.
Apologies to all the pigs of the world!


- Pitter Patter
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Sun, 15 Jul 2001 17:00:58 -0300
My wife did a rain dance yesterday!  It was SOOO funny to watch - but
it must have worked 'cos we got a solid inch of rain during the night.
Well done, honey.  The rain was most welcome.

An eagle tried to land on our roof today, but some small birdles mobbed
it and drove it off.
Poor thing.  A muckle big bird being shooed away by those little things.

Regards,
Prof. Peter 'Muddy Boots' Crane


- PIGs a-go-go
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Wed, 04 Jul 2001 17:07:24 -0300
Well, I just took delivery of me new PIG (you might remember
that the dogs chewed the old one) when the heavens opened!

We got almost an inch of rain (and that is definite) today.

Now, I was thinking, for my next generation of PIG should I
get one with a COVER??
It would stop the rain from getting in and making it wet!

Regards,
Prof. Peter 'Bright Ideas' Crane


- A State of Undress
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Thu, 28 Jun 2001 09:46:02 -0300
More tragedy!

My last two notes have had their 'return address' corrupted!

Was it done by my Internet Service Provider?  What do YOU think?

Any which way, my correct e-mail address is:-
       pcrane AT caribsurf.com

Regards,
Prof. Peter 'No Mail Yet?' Crane


- Tragic - additional
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT mtest.caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Wed, 27 Jun 2001 16:38:41 -0300
Since my last note it has been raining - raining - raining!
Forty-five minutes and counting.

EASILY the heaviest rain of the year and maybe (fingers crossed) an
end to the drought.

So, how much rain did we get, today?
I CONFIDENTLY estimate it at ONE INCH, but my PIG's been chewed
remember, so it might be a yard or a millimetre - who knows?
Thankee, thankee!

I'll have to feed the dogs in my galoshes.
NO, silly, I'm not going to put their food in my galoshes - I'll
wear the galoshes as I feed the dogs.
Why are galoshes called galoshes?  Is it because when you walk on 
wet grass they make a galoshing sound?  Answers on a postcard, please.

Regards,
Prof. Peter 'Confused' Crane
P.S.
        The rain has stopped now!


- Tragic
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT mtest.caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Wed, 27 Jun 2001 15:44:01 -0300
Oh woe!

Is there anyone out there who remembers me procuring, at huge expense,
my hi-tech integrating Precipitation Indication Gauge (PIG - patent
applied for) which was cunningly disguised as a plastic bottle with the
top cut off?
It's guarantee had just expired when it was blown off the gallery and
one of the dogs has chewed it!
I guess it was useless anyway - we haven't had any rain for long enough.

Should I get another, seeing that we are in a drought 
                                    and it will NEVER rain again?

Regards,
Prof. Peter 'Weather Predictor' Crane
P.S.
     It has just started to rain as I type this!
PPS
     John and I have started another game of e-mail chess.


- Wave Goodbye
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT surfmail.caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Thu, 14 Jun 2001 09:47:15 -0300
Whoops!

I really should learn to ignore the forecast on the local radio.

How much rain do you think we got last night? NONE - that's how much!

Sorry.

Prof. Peter 'Red-in-the-face' Crane


- Making Waves
  • From: Peter Crane <pcrane AT surfmail.caribsurf.com>
  • Date: Wed, 13 Jun 2001 19:14:44 -0300
Welcome to 2001!

We are in a VERY severe drought here but it LOOKS as though a 
Tropical Wave will come over the whole island chain (maybe tonight).

YIPPEE!

Lots of rain (and a bit of wind) will do for me.

As long as it doesn't disrupt my excellent e-mail game of chess with 
John I will be MORE than happy.

Getting out the paddles,
Prof. Peter 'Mate-in-17' Crane


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